Sunday, February 27, 2011

Did You Look?

I hate when people tell me they check out my blog, and they clearly did not. I can look at my stats, and see where people have visited from. Being honest is a big thing that we learn to work on in recovery. We are taught, again, to learn the value in truth and honesty. We are encouraged to be honest with ourselves, and we have to "take a good, honest look at ourselves" before we can get better. After years of addiction, some people will never trust us again. And we painfully, slowly build that trust with our loved ones again.

And then, you look around to realize most of the world is full of liars.

I really could care less if someone checks out my blog, or not. I write it for me, and now for all of you who have become my community. If I give someone the link, it is merely because I think it may interest/benefit them...it has nothing to do with me. And I could care less if someone looks at it or not...so why lie to me, and tell me you did? (It is always those in the straight world that do this, by the way...the addicts and ex addicts I know either lap it up, or honestly say they have not had time...)
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11 comments:

  1. Bar L.February 27, 2011 at 12:18 PM

    I jumped to the same conclusion before but then I realized that if someone reads your blog in Google Reader (like I often do) it won't show up in the stats! Only if someone actually is on your actual blog. I sometimes read blogs in my reader then jump on to make a comment, and sometimes I read them and don't leave a comment and the person has no way of knowing I was there. I do this to save time, not to be sneaky!

    But I know what you mean and I have wondered if people though I was lying to them when I said I read their blog and they checked and didn't see me on there!

    So maybe you weren't lied to but maybe you were and if you were the person that said they are reading is missing out if they aren't.

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  2. UnknownFebruary 27, 2011 at 2:47 PM

    Exactly what Barbara said LOL. I read alot of blogs in Google Reader, and only jump to the blog itself if I feel the need to leave a comment. I do read your blog every time you post however. Just so you know!!!

    Hang in there.

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  3. BMelonsLemonadeFebruary 27, 2011 at 5:36 PM

    Can someone read it in google reader even when they don't have a blog?? The person that told me they read it barely even uses a computer...

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  4. beachteacherFebruary 27, 2011 at 10:35 PM

    have you read Zeitoun, by Dave Eggers? My daughter was telling me about it today...she's part way through reading it,..and I thought about you and that you may like to read it.

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  5. BMelonsLemonadeFebruary 28, 2011 at 10:48 AM

    @Beachteacher...yes, I have read Zeitoun. My good friend is the lawyer in the book. I think Zeitoun is the best book out about Katrina. (Until mine comes out, of course!)

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  6. Sarcastic BastardFebruary 28, 2011 at 12:27 PM

    Motherfuckers will disappoint you endlessly in this life.

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  7. BMelonsLemonadeMarch 1, 2011 at 11:08 AM

    @SB...you are soooooo right! I love your honesty...and you, too!

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  8. GledwoodMarch 2, 2011 at 2:28 PM

    what the hell is google reader? i read you blog here..!


    ukkh i'm so sorry if/because i went over the top when some person robbed you. probably the last thing you wanted to hear was me banging away, even in cyberspace. i knew i was being vehement but was a bit too manic to judge how much over the top i probably was ukkkkkkhhhhh

    hey i got a diagnonsense: schizoaffective disorder (european icd10 version) i'm not sure whether i'm not just bipolar in america as i've never had 2 weeks outside a mood cycle that i can clearly recall... in a long long time i am probably what they call a rapid cycler literally depressed one day manic the next normal today but really schizzy see this is just too weird

    anyway i will leave it there i hope what i said makes sense

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  9. GledwoodMarch 2, 2011 at 2:34 PM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  10. GledwoodMarch 2, 2011 at 2:35 PM

    trust me not to explain something: under icd10 criteria you have schizophrenia and bipolar AT THE SAME TIME and that is schizoaffective, but it's also possible in Europe to have bipolar and schizophrenia separately when they appear in discrete episodes; under DSMIV criteria you have bipolar then when that fades you still have schizophrenia: which means in Europe you'd have a literal double diagnosis of schizophrenia and bipolar whereas that IS American schizoaffective. I'm definitely the European version, but the American one I haven't a clue about, honestly

    i hope this is clearer than mud, it doesn't feel very clear to me. my fucking illness and still i don't know about it!

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  11. Tatyanna (and Dorian too)March 11, 2011 at 1:08 PM

    Wow, well, this is my first time here, so I shant pretend otherwise :P I never knew that this blog name, which I've seen on some of my online friends' blogrolls, belonged to YOU, the "BLemon..." person whose comments I always like so much on other blogs!!!! Good Lord, it's a wonder I make it thru the day.

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