Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Some Things You Can Never Get Back

Memory shattering
Spilling out
In tiny little bits
And pieces,
From all the corners
Of my soul.

Images flashing
Back and forth on my mind
Round and round
In my head
And I think,
And I think,
About it all
Again and again.

Relive it all
Flesh drenching
Hands clenching
Muscle spasms
Head all full of muddle
Knees twitching
And all the memories
All the memories
Flooding back down
Over me.

Some things you can never get back.
Images of what
Once was.
Dark and black
And decaying.
And images of
What could have been.

All the moments in between...
And I know
Some things
You can never
Get back.

Time passed
Buried bodies
And buried memories
Wasted time
And wasted lives
And all the moments
I can never take back
Theft and brutal beating
Arms always full of bruises
Rape and ravage
Some things
You can never get back.

Images flash
Once more...
The pictures of my life
Flashing before me,
I see white light
The end of my life.
Images flash
Back and forth
On those caverns
Of my mind
Some buried
And some repressed
And others cherished...

Lives and loves lost
Lifeless, limp body
And wet muddy land.
Moments missing
And others mark me

Battle within...
On what to take
In case of fire.
And what
To leave
And let it all burn.

Some things you can never get back.
And other things you can never change.
Some of it,
We have control over,
And the rest...
Well, it is all the rest.
What you decide to do with it
Seals your own fate.

To this day,
I am still not sure what I am gonna do.
And I wish,
I could just get
A few moments back.
I swear I would not waste them.

Ahhhh, the tortures of regret.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Graduation Is Upon Us, Well...Me, Anyway

Well, just a mere update...but, a very important one, at that. I finished my last class of my college career tonight. At least until I change my mind and go to grad school. For the time being, though, I am sticking it out at the restaurant...while I set aside one day to write. And I am going to pursue writing for the next six months, while I pay my bills waiting tables. My mouth is watering to think of the delicious Carnitas we serve! (That seems like a sarcastic comment, but really I love the Carnitas...and I guess I am glad that there will not be too much change all at once in my life.)

It really seems like I just started back to school the other day. I actually was blogging when I first went back to college. And I graduate on Saturday.

I am glad it is over. I am glad to relax a little tonight. And then, tomorrow morning...I am going to start my new writing projects. Or I am going to dedicate the morning to my new projects that I have already started.

Graduation. I am proud, I guess. I am glad to be finished, finally. And I hope to make a living as a writer within the next two years...in any capacity I can.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Off The Cuff

In a sea of madness
A thousand
Different people.
Screaming out from roof tops.
And one...
Just one lone person,
It seemed.
It seems,
At least now.
In a sea of madness,
All over again.
But, the game is very different.

I am drowning.
They were drowning.
So many people have drowned.
The waters,
The waters all around.
I was.
I am.
I relive the water
All around.
And I think...

I know how to swim.
I know...
I know how to sink,
And I am trying to
At all costs.

In emotions of the past,
And all this stuff
Has only made me stronger.
And I gotta make it happen.
I gotta make it happen.