Saturday, December 18, 2010

Christmas Thoughts

Christmas has taken on a whole new meaning to me this year. My son is almost two years old, and he is really excited about Christmas. He sees Santa Claus everywhere, and he exclaims..."Santa Claus!" When you ask him, where? He responds pointing, "Right dere." He loves the Christmas lights, and the reindeer. He loves the "Noman," other wise know as the Snowman. He talks about presents, and how he really wants skateboards.

I have never put up a Christmas tree before. Let's face it, a junky usually doesn't put up a Christmas tree; I barely realized Christmas was coming up some years. And in the last few years...well, just too much going on. But, this year, I had to do it for my son. He really wanted one. And he wanted a big one, he made that very clear when we went to look at the trees one day. I had to wait two weeks to afford a big one, but that is what my son wanted to do. I bought lights, and decorations for the first time as well. My son had a blast decorating it, although he got very upset when one of the silver balls dropped on the floor and shattered. First thing in the morning, he asks for me to turn the lights on the Christmas tree on.

We have been listening tom Christmas music in the car. I am not a big fan of Christmas music, but I have managed to find a few good albums. Kermit Ruffins Christmas album, Ella Fitzgerald's Christmas album, Harry Connick Jrs Christmas albums are a few I really like. My son sings along with Jingle Bells and Santa Claus is Coming to Town.

We have really been doing it up with the season this year. So, I decided to take him to the mall to see Santa Claus. I wanted to make a night of it, so I got him a cute outfit for the picture. I know most of you are thinking, maybe a little Christmas outfit...well, he is too fashionable for that. I picked out this black jacket with red embroidery and a patch on the back that had flames and angel wings and dripping and splattered paint. The jeans had crosses with angel wings and flames, and his shirt was a long sleeve punk rock t-shirt. I had on my long black vinyl jacket with the crazy fur collar, sporting my usual chain wallet and ripped jeans. Santa actually commented on his outfit, and then he asked me if we rode bikes.

I thought it was pretty cool that Santa asked me if we rode bikes. We do not, but we must have looked pretty cool if that is the impression we made on Santa Claus. I said, "No, sir...we are punk rockers." And he chuckled, with a look in his eyes like my grandad would have had at that he had no idea what a punk rocker was. I am proud that Santa at least confirmed that I am cool.

We got a great picture, and had dinner at Chic-fil-A...which my son devoured. Then, he had some cookies from his father's work, which is the nicest restaurant at the mall. (It is really nice.) We sang Christmas songs the whole way home, and I took the long way so we could see more Christmas lights. We came home and we laughed and talked and played with a toy I bought him at the mall. Before we started watching Christmas movies, we went to put on his pajamas. I offered his red and white pants that we have always referred to as his Santa Claus pants because my best friend said they "looked like the kind of pants Santa Claus wears to bed." I thought for sure, after his great Santa Claus experience, he would surely want to wear these pants. I realized that he may be too much like me, when he insisted that he wears his Halloween skeleton pajamas instead.


  1. We have 8 inches of snow at the moment in London!
    Very christmassy..

    I've never bothered with a tree.. seems a bit sad, two middle aged gay men getting a tree but I would totally do it if I had kids!

    Have a great holiday

  2. did i not comment on this last night? I could have sworn I did. I am excited for your Christmas too! Your son is adorable and at such a sweet age!!!

  3. Best holiday story I've read so far.

    Love you. Happy holidays!


  4. Hi I featured you on my blog tonight. Remember I mentioned I was going to write something about how an outside event can reveal the Willingness finally to make that jump from Active Addiction towards Cleaning Up? Well I wrote it, not as formally as I had anticipated, but I gave three examples, 2 from memoirs I've read, the third was you in Hurricane Katrina. I think you have an important story to tell. How could anything good possibly come from the most devastating hurricane to hit the US in decades? What for hundreds of thousands of others represented desolation on a vast scale was actually an escape route. I think that's a brilliant spin, or an angle, or whatever those media types call it (you know what book publishers are like, they always want an "angle"...) I wish you all the best with your book. You deserve it.

    I also want to say thank you for being a friend to Anna. I have stepped in sometimes to protect her because I think she needs protecting. The tactless, cruel remarks that nasty ignorant people leave on her blog sometimes beggar belief. Is it a crime to be bipolar, unable to work and to claim state assisance? According to those people it is. They really need to walk a mile in that lady's moccosins before talking any more of their crud.

    What Anna needs more than anything is Real Friendship and as a fellow friend I respect deeply that you have taken time out to help her.

    Finally although I cannot send you an Xmas present perhaps this will do. From a fellow addict who knows the score, someone should say this, at least once in a while, so I'm saying it now: WELL DONE. Don't ever forget how far you have come.

    Here's wishing you a Very Merry One and more importantly a Sublime 2011!

    With best wishes from London

    Gledwood ;-)


    PS If you have any other posts that would be of interest, just give the full link and I'll add it with the book extract links.

  5. @Gled, I really like Anna. She reminds me of me at times, and also of several close friends. One thing I really like about her, is how she responds to criticism...she looks at it realistically, and she takes it humbly. I like that she does not let it break her, and she fights back sometimes. I respect her honesty, and I like her brash, raw qualities. I respect that she is not afraid to lay it all out on the table, and let the pieces fall where they takes a strong person to lay their heart, and life, out on the table. Anna is much stronger on the inside than she realizes, and one day, she will be surprised and enlightened by that strength. Plus, she can really create an image with words when she pours her soul into it...and that is a quality that any artist can respect.

    And Merry Christmas to you, too! Best wishes from North Cackalackie (that is what we say in the Carolinas to make it sound even more country than it already is here.)