Friday, July 8, 2011

To Liam...Ignore the Damn Spanish


  1. Courtney Love reminds me of my ex. And even though my ex was rather capricious I think Courtney Love takes the biscuit in that regard.

    I once read a biography of Kurt and what really stuck in my craw was the way Courtney took charge of his credit cards while he was in rehab with a habit SHE GAVE HIM, so when he left he didn't even have cab fare home. Home where SHE was no doubt using every single day as he clucked his bollocks off! Controlling bitch.

    (I don't like Courtney Love.)

  2. Can I ask you something? Being 4 years clean and sober.... do you ever crave anything ever? And if so how frequently and more to the point WHAT?... And if not, how long did the cravings take to go?

    I heard the first year off opiates is pretty horrendous for most people, but after that you really do start feeling better... is that right?

    And how DID you clean up? I never quite got that one. Did you reduce methadone or Suboxone to zero "in the community"... or did you go to detox/rehab. If so, what did you detox on? And how difficult was it for you? Did you have a lot of difficulties with sleep?

    I'm asking all this because I'm now at a new methadone clinic where they insist my over 100mg methadone dose is "very high" so it MUST be drunk under supervision every day. I don't really mind that. What I do mind is just BEING on methadone on a flat dose if I'm not using on top, which I'm not any more. So they're cutting me down at a rate of 10mg a week ~ 110mg this week. I'm hoping for 100mg the week after and down down down past 80, past 60 if possible then a 5mg a week reduction. And once I get down below 50 or preferably 30mg I'll start tapering it very smoothly and slowly. It's the last bit I'm wary of. I think clinics like to cut people off too quickly. When I've reduced on heroin I have never EVER felt withdrawal. Bear in mind I might use 2 bags one day, 4 the next, 1 the day after, 2 the day after that, then 3 then 2 then 4 then 1 then 1 then 2 ie totally different doses every day and my body never complained. So what's the big deal with reducing methadone less than 10% each 7 days?

    If you have any facts, advice or experience I'd be most grateful to hear them from you. I'm out on a limb here with nobody to ask who really KNOWS anything. All I seem to get back is a lot of neuroticism from people who would withdraw on a green M&M if you convinced them that worked... know what I mean??!

    RSVP ;-)

  3. ps the heroin bags I'm talking about weighed 0.3-0.4g and were very good gear, so I could hold myself on 0.4g, normally... anyway the amounts don't matter, you get my point though ~ all heroin addicts use differing doses every day because no two batches of street heroin are the same and no 2 bags are the same. If my body's OK with that I don't see why a gradual methadone reduction should cause any problem at all!